¡Dímelo!

FIFA, the premiere association for perfidious, balding, European men and occasional soccer games accepted Miami’s World Cup bribe in crypto.

Francis Suarez strode to a podium before the Alex Hanna Coliseum, home of the Flying Cockroaches, Miami’s professional unicycle racing team.

“Disruptive innovation! Blockchain! Series B! Value curve! Web 3.0! Metaverse! 6G! Mixed reality! NFT!”

The Environmental Protection Agency will place native Miamians on the Endangered Species List given their dwindling numbers and uncertain outlook.

“As a white man with no inkling of the Latino refugee experience, I’m the perfect person to open a restaurant celebrating Chavez!” exclaimed Meenan.

Smoke rose in dark, acrid columns from Downtown Orlando as a line of shackled Disney characters trudged out of the city and into an uncertain future.

Abandoned in 1968, the shack since collapsed into a rotting jumble composed of daddy long-legs, rattlesnakes, mosquito eggs, and trace amounts of wood.

Upon inquiring whether the performance piece would be extended beyond Art Basel, Ms. Bravo laughed in my face.

At the end of the day, I’m a just a forward-thinking, tolerant, accepting Latino who wants his non-existent daughter to be happy