

a culturo-cosmic adventure
Just as the ancient Greeks, Egyptians, and Norse had their gods, villains, and heroes, Miami now has a legendary saga based on the hyperbolic surrealism that is living in South Florida. You will be introduced to a wholly unique universe with its own, often absurd, deities and norms—much like the city from which it’s inspired, and journey from the beginning of the universe, when Pachango the Creator first awoke on his divine pin pan pun, to when the cubanos and their fellow Latinics quite literally tumbled out of the waves and onto Miami’s shores. Along the way, you’ll learn answers to deep existential questions, such as: Where do croquetas come from? Who is the god of chisme? And why is everyone late to everything?
Why I Removed 10 Tons of Trash from Miami’s Mangroves
Collecting trash for 13 hours on a mangrove island in Miami’s summer heat is an excellent way to suffer dehydration and heat exhaustion.
FIFA Accepts Miami’s World Cup Bribe in Crypto
FIFA, the premiere association for perfidious, balding, European men and occasional soccer games accepted Miami’s World Cup bribe in crypto.
Miami to Replace All Remaining Affordable Housing with Stadiums
Francis Suarez strode to a podium before the Alex Hanna Coliseum, home of the Flying Cockroaches, Miami’s professional unicycle racing team.
Jason Lopez: Miami Noir Bounty Hunter
My name is Jason Lopez, and I’m pretty fuckin badass.
Miami’s Affordable Housing Program Involves Shouting Tech Buzzwords at Poor People
“Disruptive innovation! Blockchain! Series B! Value curve! Web 3.0! Metaverse! 6G! Mixed reality! NFT!”
Native Miamians Declared an Endangered Species
The Environmental Protection Agency will place native Miamians on the Endangered Species List given their dwindling numbers and uncertain outlook.
