Broward County Declares a State of Overreaction
Mayor Mark D. Bogen psyched himself up to address a conference room of reporters about an impending Broward County cold front. He wore a full suit of plate armor, three bandoliers of bullets, five grenades, a Bowie knife, and a backpack holding 20 days of...
Black Friday to Be Followed by Latino Saturday
The National Hispanic Caucus (NLC) announced that the second day after Thanksgiving would henceforth be known as Latino Saturday. Rather than joining in Black Friday’s manic shopping free-for-all, participants will enact the traditional Latino customs of talking over...
Miami Woman Faints After Wearing Winter Clothes in 80 Degree Weather
Jasmin Alfonso collapsed onto the sidewalk on the corner of SW 13th Street and 2nd Avenue. Despite temperatures peaking in the 80s on a particularly balmy Miami winter afternoon, Alfonso sported knee-high riding heels, a cashmere scarf, and Cole Haan Wrap Coat...
Miamians Hospitalized as Temperature Plunges Below 70
Pandemonium reigned in Mercy Hospital’s Emergency Room where doctors and nurses worked frantically to treat a mob of Miamians suffering from slight chilliness in the wake of an unprecedented Miami cold front. “My arms! I can’t feel my arms!” cried a woman in her 40s....
Rich Miami Asshole Doesn’t Know How to Pump His Own Gas
Ernesto Torres, known to even casual acquaintances as a paradigmatic rich Miami asshole, pulled his off-white Rolls-Royce Phantom into the Shell gas station on the corner of US-1 and SW 27th Ave. The 47-year-old Caracas native sported an immaculately tailored Italian...New Ebook
Totally Ridiculous. 100% Miami.
Read Ch. 1
Checkout the first chapter of 'The Miami Creation Myth.'
