Why I Removed 30,000 Pounds of Trash from the Mangroves
The Miami Creation Myth Sells Out
ICE Deports Marco Rubio
Every Bro You’ll Meet in a Miami Club
The Joy of Selling My 1,000th Book
Cubans’ Shift to MAGA is Rooted in Trauma & Anger
Take the Miami Gentrification Tour!
I Really Don’t Want to Be a Climate Refugee
What It Means to Write Miami Satire in Trump’s Miami
Why I Clean Miami’s Mangroves
The Miami Creation Myth Sells Out

The Miami Creation Myth Sells Out

Longtime Miami Creation Myth fans know I’ve been at this little project for a while. Eight years, to be exact. Over that time, I created thousands of memes, hundreds of essays and articles, five live shows, and two short story collections. The classic MCM lore asserts...
Every Bro You’ll Meet in a Miami Club

Every Bro You’ll Meet in a Miami Club

Miami’s world-famous club scene varies widely from venue to venue. Some are hyper-exclusive douchebag receptacles. Others are welcoming, come-as-you-are hippie free-for-alls. Below is as comprehensive a guide as several longtime Miami club enjoyers (and occasional...
The Joy of Selling My 1,000th Book

The Joy of Selling My 1,000th Book

I’m sitting in the Books & Books Cafe after finishing a key lime pie, and things feel really, really good. A little less than two years ago, I published a silly little book titled The Miami Creation Myth. It’s packed with 11 languages and dialects representing...
Cubans’ Shift to MAGA is Rooted in Trauma & Anger

Cubans’ Shift to MAGA is Rooted in Trauma & Anger

Following the 2024 presidential election, Liberal reproaches and hot takes came fast and furious at Cuban Americans. We were racists, hypocrites, sheep, class traitors, fools voting against our own interests. But I won’t critique my community in this essay. I do that...
Take the Miami Gentrification Tour!

Take the Miami Gentrification Tour!

Are you a tourist or recent arrival looking to experience an authentic slice of Miami’s beautiful, messy, chaotic mix of cultures, people, and cuisines? Of course not! You just want the most Instagramable backgrounds to rub in your friends’ faces while they freeze to...